I am narrow-minded and He is so much more

I have been reading some fellow bloggers posts and I would like to share a little testimony of prayer (or lack of) for what it is worth.

1. Before Matt and I got married we were reading Saving Your Marriage Before it Begins, very good book. One of the sections had a question that was along the lines of What will you be giving up to get married? the section had dealt with the fact that no matter what age or stage of life you will give up something when you get married and you need to come to terms with it before it turns into a source of biterness toward your spouse. For me, I felt I was giving up my college “experience” that I had always dreamed of: traveling, living in the dorms, spending time with girls, working on campus, participating in student life events… But I thought I had a good 2 years and now I’m moving on and I won’t look back or regret this choice. In my mind this was not something to pray about, because getting married at 20 required sacrifices and I was willing to give-up my college “experience”. God on the other hand had a plan that was so much more than I ever could have imagined. He gave me the desires of my heart and I had the best of both worlds (college and marriage). Matt and I had so many opportunities to travel, we lived in the dorms, and we just really made the most of our time at DBU. This taught me a big lesson about prayer and God’s love for me. I believe that my hearts desires come from Him and that I should specifically pray that he fulfill those desires no matter how big they may seem to me.

2. I could give a lot of examples from my life of small instances when the Lord answered specific prayers in my life, but I want to share one that was a spiritual battle. When Matt decided to go back to work, we knew that we would have to find child care for Jacey. On November 28th, I prayed big and honest. My prayer was: “I hate the thought of someone else watching Jacey. Please provide the perfect solution to this problem. I am trusting You.” To be honest that trust wavered and there was a period of time that I literally could not eat or sleep and I just cried for a few days because I did not trust He would provide the perfect solution. I could not trust because I could not see a solution let alone one that was perfect. I am so narrow-minded that His solution was not even on my radar. Finally, on January 8th, He provided so much more than the perfect solution. Her Gigi said that she would watch her full-time and I could breathe again. In my narrow mind this was not even an option to be prayed about, so thankfully He had so much more planned.

So to anyone reading this that is going through a tough time and you don’t see a way out just know that we are narrow minded and short sighted. God has the perfect solution and it is probably so much more than you can fathom, so trust Him and be patient.